Stunning Companion Needed for Formal Events - 45

I’m a 45-year old SWM. I have a few formal events in 2013 that I would need to attend with a sophisticated stunning woman. I would simply like to meet a few times before the events and see if we have some chemistry (and of course for later on – as not to appear as if we just met – that would be awkward). Kindly send me a picture and why you believe you would make an excellent candidate in this fun endeavor(s). Of course, I value your time – so give me an idea of your excepted incentive. I have been told many times I missed my calling as a stand-up comic – so kindly erase any thoughts about some pompous idiot who goes around bragging about materialistic things he owns and is now looking for some kind of escort. Lastly, please no "professionals." Much appreciated - thanks.